Divorce Proofing A Marriage In Six Steps

As a do-it-yourself divorce service, we see a lot of cases where marriages have fallen apart simply because the parties involved didn’t think it through before they took this major step to forever (theoretically) change their lives. So many of the divorce issues that we see could have been avoided had couples taken the time early on to “divorce-proof” their marriage. Here are six of the most common ways to do just that.

Fools Rush In — Don’t Be One. 

Many cases of divorce could be prevented if couples just took the time to get to know each other before saying, “I do.” While it’s hard to define a “right time” and a “wrong time” — each relationship is different — you should never consider marriage before your first fight.

Talk About The Tough Stuff.

Money, sex, religion, politics — if you’re “getting along well” but haven’t discussed any of this stuff, then you’re not ready to be married. Beliefs cut to the core of who we are. No matter where we come from, we have experiences and systems that define us. Entering in to a supposedly lifelong commitment while refusing to tackle these topics is a surefire recipe for disaster.

Listen To Your Friends And Family.

Ideally, your friends and/or family know and care about you more than anyone else in the world. They’re there for you before a relationship, and if it comes down to it, they’ll be there after a relationship. Heed their advice. Seek their honest opinions. Let them know honesty is important to you, and then back up your talk by valuing their opinions.

Deal With Your Personal Issues First.

Never look for another person to “fix” you, and never think you’re capable of fixing another person. Many decisions to file for divorce started with this kind of logic. Real change must come from within.

Spend Time Together.

The more you spend time together, the more you will learn about what you have in common. You’ll also learn a lot about your differences, which is just as important. And if you should have any disagreements —

Fight It Out.

Couples who don’t fight have no idea how to resolve the inevitable conflict. If you’re impressed by how little you and your significant other fight, don’t be. It likely means you’re avoiding.

While we offer DIY divorce to ease the time and the costs on couples heading for a breakup, we would prefer to see healthy relationships. By sticking with the above divorce proofing tips, you can avoid the situations that lead to the end.